Years ago, I was living a tedious, tiring life. My children were grown and out of the house, and I was working overtime anyway, just so that my husband and I could keep up a lifestyle that I couldn’t even enjoy. I believe that I suffered from chronic fatigue syndrome. Most evenings I would come home from work and crash on the couch while my husband enjoyed himself at the country club. One such evening, I had a very interesting dream.
I woke up and sitting on the opposite end of the couch was a very tall man dressed in a black suit with a black shirt and tie holding a very expensive looking black briefcase on his lap. I sat up and asked him what he was doing there.
“You called me.” He said.
“No, I didn’t. I don’t even know who you are.”
“Yes, you did, you called me several times.” he replied as he opened his briefcase and started looking through some papers.
“So, do you want to make it fast, like an accident, or do you want some time to say goodbye to your loved ones, like maybe via liver cancer? That would be good, it would afford you some closure, but you wouldn’t have to linger too long.”
I freaked out and told him that I had no intention of dying anytime soon. He looked at me with pity.
“I’m sure you do, in fact you are living as if you already were dead. You often pray for an end to this existence. I have it all documented here.” He said.
“Well, I’ve changed my mind! Please get out of here! I don’t want to die!” I screamed.
“Suit yourself” he said as he picked up his papers and walked towards the door. “Be more careful about calling me, I will come back when you call. It’s my job. It’s what I do.”
And he walked out the front door.
When I actually woke up, I was sitting upright on the couch looking at the door. The vivid dream hit me hard and opened my eyes to what I was doing to myself. For days after, I looked at my life and decided to make big changes. What I had viewed as a sorry fate, I now saw as the result of choices I had made. The joyless way I was living was killing me.
I tried to make some changes right away, but I fell back into the pattern of working until exhaustion every day. More and more I noticed the fears that were behind my drive to keep up appearances. It took several dream visits from this mysterious person before I was pushed into action. I always felt love and a sort of angelic presence in these dreams even though the message was urgent and frightening. I was convinced that the dream visitor was my version of the angel of death.
My prayer changed from asking for an end to this life, to asking for joy in this life. In the months that followed, I quit my job, divorced my country club show-off husband, and moved to another city. Jumping into the void of the unknown wasn’t easy. My friends and relatives judged me harshly for leaving, but I knew that I was saving my life.
During the divorce proceedings I discovered that my husband had taken several life insurance policies out on me worth well over a million dollars. Not only had he noticed that I was dying, but he had been counting on it! In addition to that, odd expenditures indicated that he had been having an affair.
I haven’t been to a country club, or on a yacht in years, and don’t miss those false friends a bit. I kind of shudder at the thought of revisiting that lifestyle. Now I have a career that I love, a husband who loves me, a lovely home in the country and many like-minded friends. I’m working toward enjoying perfect health. I’m not quite there yet, but I feel 100 times better than I did that year. Getting here took a big act of courage that was spurred on by my dream.
Was it a visit from the angel of death, or was it my own subconscious waking me up to know the truth? What ever it was, it was a life changing miracle.